Friday, August 14, 2009

"How Do You Like Living In New York?"

We get that question a lot. And the standard short answer always is, "We love it!"

Do you realize it has almost been a year since we moved here? I can't believe that. It doesn't seem that long. Actually, it's one of those things that when you say "It's been a year since we moved to New York" my first thought is, "wow, a whole year? Seriously?" BUT, when I think about the discrete events that led up to the move - Eric's graduation, the Bar Exam, packing up our apartment, arriving in New York - it seems like so, so long ago. A year seems like both way too long and not long enough all at once, do you know what I mean? It's weird.

But whether I believe it or not, a week ago Thursday marked one year since the movers came and took all of our stuff out of DC. This past Wednesday marked one year since WE actually left DC. Of course, we didn't actually arrive in New York until September 1st - we took some time to visit with family in Florida and celebrate my mother-in-law's birthday, plus we traveled to the Caymans to celebrate our first anniversary. Which brings me to yet another "holy cow, it's been another YEAR?!" moment...I can't believe it's almost our second wedding anniversary! Time really does fly when you're having fun, I guess.

So, we have a whole year in the Big Apple under our belts. And man, have we been enjoying it. We've done so many fun things and have really been trying to take advantage of our surroundings. I do love this city - I love the sights, the sounds, the activities, the excitement, the people, and the fast pace. It is such a fun place to live and we really are living the life I have dreamed about for a long time.

Of course, there are two sides to every coin. Lately I have been feeling a little unsettled here. Neither Eric nor I imagine us being here permanently. We do want to have a family and a house and a yard where our kids (and Achilles) can play. In New York, there is no way we could afford the space we would need to raise our family the way we would like. And honestly, neither of us is particularly interested in New York-suburb living. New Jersey, Connecticut, and even Brooklyn just don't interest us. So, we've always sort of had the mindset that when we wanted to start growing our family and settle in to a permanent home, we would be leaving New York.

The only problem with that is that I'm starting to feel ready for those things, but not yet ready to leave New York. As much as I love our New York life, I feel like our "grown-up" life has to be put on hold so long as we stay here. We can't consider buying a house. We can't really consider starting our family. I see my friends and family doing those things, and part of me gets a little bit jealous. I do want those things, too. But they are just not really options for us so long as we live here. I guess I just want to have my cake and eat it, too.

There's no real solution at this point, I suppose. I do want to get on with the next phase of our lives and our marriage, but I'm not ready to leave New York yet. I do mean it when I tell people we love living here. We really do. So for the time being, we'll be staying here and the next step will just have to wait.

In the meantime, Happy New York-iversary to us!

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