Friday, August 8, 2014

Inexplicably Homesick

We moved into our new house yesterday, and it has been quite a whirlwind of a week. Hopefully I'll be able to calm the chaos and show off our new place to you soon!

We're excited to take this next step in Jacksonville, and to really give "suburban life" a fair shake. We still don't know what the future holds for us or where we'll end up, but having already lived the city life for a number of years, now we're trying the picket fence thing.

And generally, I'm on board with that. I think it's good to at least get a taste of all our options in order to figure out where we really see ourselves long-term. I get nostalgic for city life quite often (thanks a lot, friends who still live there and post amazing city pictures on Facebook and Instagram all the time...), but we're settling in to Jacksonville just fine and recognizing that it could possibly be more of a long-term option for us.

But then, sometimes, it still sneaks up on me out of nowhere: homesickness. A few days ago, the trigger was this random photo from Humans of NY on Instagram (one of my absolute favorites):

I came across that picture as I was scrolling through Instagram before bed one night, and for some reason, that random, goofy photo got to me. I looked at it and read the caption, and out of nowhere I felt a pit in my stomach, a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. Man, I miss New York.

Looking back at that picture, I really can't tell you what triggered such an aching reaction for me. Maybe it's the look of the New York street. Maybe it's the evident hustle and bustle in the background. Maybe it's the featured man's ridiculous and light-hearted attitude, and the way that symbolizes the eclectic eccentricity of New York. Maybe it was even just that unmistakable glimpse of taxicab-yellow on the right. Who knows? But whatever it was, it made me feel like a fish out of water all over again and reminded me that a significant chunk of my heart and soul still resides in the Big Apple.

There's no real point here. There's no take-home message or simple resolution. I simply just wanted to document that, hey, almost two years after we left, I still long to be back on those city streets. I don't know what the future holds. I do hope it holds more time in New York, but time will tell what is ultimately best for our family. So for now, I'll continue to do my best to give Jacksonville a fair shot, while still sighing over Instagram photos that remind me of the extraordinary place that I used to call home.

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